Imagine bumping into a stranger in the street, saying "Alright mate!" and giving them a big friendly pat on the back... 🤦

That's basically what it feels like when someone you barely know calls you "mate" at work.

The "Friendly" Trap

People who do this are generally trying to sound friendly and approachable — and that's great! But "mate" isn't a neutral filler word. It implies an actual friendship. When it isn't there, it lands somewhere between presumptuous and patronising.

The micro-awkwardness is real. Sarah carries a tiny, unnecessary cognitive load into her morning. Just drop the filler:

• "No worries mate." → "No worries."
• "Cheers mate, appreciate it." → "Cheers, appreciate it."
• "Hey mate, got a sec?" → "Hey Sarah, got a sec?"

A Better Way

It's incredibly easy to be warm, professional, and clear without assuming close friendship.

If you worry that using only their name sounds too formal, add genuine warmth instead of filler tags:

• "Morning Sarah! Hope you had a good weekend — could you send over that report?"
• "Hey James, no rush but could you take a look at this when you get a sec?"
• "Hi Priya! Thanks so much for the help earlier, really appreciated it."

But what if we actually are mates?

Brilliant — then crack on. The word isn't the problem, the assumption is. If you've been to the pub together, been to each other's weddings, or regularly text outside of work, you're actual mates and the word fits perfectly.

It's the default use — chucked at every colleague, client, and stranger in a meeting — that's the habit worth breaking. And if you're unsure whether you're close enough? You're probably not.

It may seem like a small thing (it is, kinda 👀) so please don't be too hard on the person who sent you here. They just want to feel like a person, not a prop in someone else's banter.